How To Sneak Into E3
Have you ever wondered how to sneak into E3? Some people who read that line will throw their arms up and scream, “Hell yes!” or “Already have” while others are wondering what in the world an E3 is. E3 is short for Electronics Entertainment Expo (three E’s, get it?), not to be confused with E3, which stands for ‘Economy, Energy, and Environment.’ The initially-mentioned E3 is the largest and most impressive conference and trade show for the gaming industry that exists today. The convention is a way for game developers to flaunt their stuff and stroke each other’s egos, and it’s also an invitation-only affair for people who work in the game industry. As in, this is not like Tekkoshocon where any unwashed slob wearing a Pac-Man shirt can buy a pass. And there are no cat girls here that you can try and feel up either.
Before detailing ways to sneak into E3, it will be noted that this article does not condone infiltrating the event since doing so could get you into trouble. So, if you decide to try and ninja your way inside, we don’t want to hear about it.
Anyway, here are a few hints and tips to get you into E3:
- Badges and cards. You’re not going to get too far if you don’t have a badge; everybody who is meandering around inside E3 has one. If you try and steal or buy another attendee’s badge, be sure the name happens to match yours…if you’re an obese middle-aged man, be sure you don’t pinch a badge from someone named “Sarah.” You’ll also need a business card proving you’re not some otaku schmuck looking to masturbate over the Red Dead Redemption previews, so get busy working on that too. Oh, and color photocopies of badges will not work; they will, in fact, be confiscated and you will be thrown out.
- Look professional. No one’s going to think you work in the game industry if you show up with unwashed hair and the same Power Rangers t-shirt you wore when you were five. Even if you’re going to pretend to be the press (who can get in), try and at least look like a reporter. And make sure you don’t look like a teeny-bopper, even if you are one. Someone will notice a child wandering around amongst the adults, and this will make attempts to sneak into E3 that much more difficult.
- In disguise. Knock out one of the security guards and steal their uniform. Be sure they don’t see you, or else they might be able to identify you…or hit you first.
- Become a member. Sometimes if you’re a member of video game-related organizations or sites, you can get in through that membership. For example, Jumpgate offered to get people into E3 for an hour for this year’s conference, so long as said people were at least 18. This one is actually legitimate, and probably a lot easier than fighting with security.
- Become a manager. It’s said that if you’re a higher-up for a store like Best Buy or Gamestop, you might be able to get in since you’ll be selling the crap the E3 folks are parading. Mere employees need not even try since they’ve no discretion in deciding what games reach store shelves.
- In a box. Sneak into E3 dressed as Snake from the Metal Gear Solid series. This one is about as likely to work as the other suggestions (meaning a very slim or nonexistent chance), so why not?
Also, know that other guides for sneaking into E3 online right now are from several years ago when E3 was just starting. Security has been fortified significantly since the time of bored gamer nerds slinking past security by creeping into the west entrance with the smokers back in 2006.