How To Survive A Blind Date Dinner

At some point in your singlehood, you will have to learn how to survive a blind date dinner. Whether it's your mom angling for grandbabies or your married pal tired of seeing that carefree look on your face, eventually someone will con you into going out with a girl you've never met because they're sure she's "the one" for you. Never fear, you can survive this foray into the wild and live to tell unflattering, hilarious stories about it.  

1. Keep low (or no) expectations and an open mind. Going into it, your mutual friend or loved one may have exaggerated your date's attractiveness, intelligence, or long-term mating suitability. Go into the evening with the mindset of having a good time with a stranger, and that's it. That way, if she isn’t what fantasies are made of, you won't have disappointment written all over your face. Similarly, if you usually date prissy princess types and your pal hooks you up with a more down to earth girl, he may be onto something. Either way it goes, don't be too quick to make up your mind about her. 
2. Be your (best) self. You know that job interview trick about dressing one level above the business work attire? Try that. If you are a sweatpants and t-shirt guy, up the ante to a polo and khakis. That way, you're presenting your best self, but not a fabrication. Don't feel like you are trying to be someone you aren't. Your friend may have already told her things about you, so lying is out; she has a built-in fact-checker. If you're a vegan, don't take her to dinner at a steak house just because you knew she grew up in the Midwest. You're only setting yourself up for a world of backpedalling. Be chivalrous, not chauvinistic. Regular dating rules still apply on blind dates.
3. Make conversation. Ask open ended questions. Listen to what she tells you. Smile, nod, be engaged. When in doubt, go for pop culture, current events, hobbies and interests, and family. Things that strangers can easily connect on are general and superficial: movies, music, food, your city. If all else fails, talk about the person that set you up. Surviving a dinner date is extremely painful in awkward silence.
4. Keep it friendly. No politics, religion or conspiracy theories. A little flirty debating about which Superman movie was the worst or whether your college team will make it to the bowl games is perfectly fine, but nothing too serious. You don't want her to think (or know) that you're a total d-bag on the first date. It will severely limit your chances of anything more than a flimsy handshake and will most certainly get back to your matchmaker.
5. Know when and how to call it a night. Don't bail on her. Even if she's ugly. And boring. And a Republican. Tough it out. But, if your dinner is stretching too far and going nowhere, know how to abort the mission. Don't tell her you have to get up early, it's a slap in the face. Instead, don't offer an excuse at all. Say something simple, like "Well, I better get you home," or "Thanks for having dinner with me." If you are bad in uncomfortable situations, plan ahead. For example, make your date for late enough in the evening the restaurant will be closing by desert. That way, you can either split or ask her out for drinks, depending on how the night went. No matter what, knowing when to call it and always ending on a high note are imperatives for surviving a blind date. If the night went well, offer her a hug. Not so well, shake her hand. Always be courteous and gracious and make her feel like she did you a favor by having dinner with you.