How To Talk To A Woman At A Bar

When most guys are looking for a little female companionship, whether it be for an hour, a night or a lifetime, they head to a bar, ignoring the fact that very few men actually know how to talk to a woman at a bar. If you don't know how to talk to a woman at a bar, a night out just becomes a very efficient way to empty your wallet while looking longingly at women across the room. The good news is, there are a few simple techniques you can practice that will help you learn how to talk to a woman at a bar without embarrassing yourself.

  1. Choose wisely. Obviously, there's very little point to approaching a woman who's already talking and flirting with another guy unless you like the feel of having your nose broken. It's probably also pointless to approach a woman who's sitting at a table with other people and who looks deeply invested in the conversation. Instead, look for single woman or groups of two or three who are standing at the bar or playing darts or pool. They're probably the ones open to meeting someone new and they might be just as worried about figuring out how to talk to a man at a bar as you are about how to talk to a woman at a bar.
  2. Ditch the pickup lines. The problem with pickup lines is that they're generic. They don't actually say anything specific about the woman you're trying to talk to other than highlighting the fact that you want to talk to her. Once the line is out of your mouth it's often very hard to figure out what to say next even if you do manage to make her smile and laugh. Instead of using a generic pickup line, don't approach her until you've figured out a comment that you can make about her specifically. If she's playing pool, comment on her technique. If she's playing darts, challenge her to a game. If she's just standing at the bar, take the time to figure out what she's drinking and make a comment about that. Women like to feel like you're approaching them because you like something specific about them, not just because you like women in general.
  3. Give her one real compliment. If you approach a woman, it's a good bet you really like at least one thing about her. Tell her, but make it specific. Don't tell her she has nice eyes. Tell her she has beautiful blue eyes. You'll get points for actually noticing the color. Obviously, if you don't want to offend her, don't comment on out of bounds body parts or make your compliment too sexual or explicit.
  4. Offer your phone number. If you guys are hitting if off, don't ask for her phone number, offer yours. Even if she likes you, she may feel uncomfortable about giving her number to a stranger she just met in a bar.
  5. Know when to quit. Even if you know exactly how to talk to a woman at a bar, you're not going to charm every woman every time. Look for signs that she'd rather you just left her alone. She might be trying to tell you to go away if she's avoiding eye contact, standing with her body facing away from yours or just nodding while you talk instead of actually trying to have a conversation with you. The sooner you acknowledge she's not interested, the less of your own time you'll waste.

If you follow these simple steps, learning how to talk to a woman at a bar shouldn't be difficult and the more you practice, the more adept you'll become.

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