All giggling aside, knowing how to use Sex Wax is important if you have a brand new surfboard. Without a good wax job, you will spend most of your time wind milling your arms around before sliding off the board into the sea. Sex Wax is a popular brand of surfboard wax created by Mr. Zog and his chemist pal Nate Skinner. The suggestive brand name has spawned a host of merchandise from bumper stickers to clothing lines. Oh and the surf wax works great too.
To use Sex Wax on a brand new surfboard, you will need:
- Mr. Zog’s Sex Wax
- What flavor? Sex Wax and most other brands of surf wax are rated by water temperature. If you are lucky enough to surf in tropical climates, the wax you use is harder and has a higher melting point than cold water wax. When you have a brand new surfboard, it is advisable to get a couple bars of the hardest (the blue one rated for tropical) Sex Wax to use as a basecoat. You do not actually need it, but it makes applying softer waxes much easier and creates those lovely little bumps you will be using for traction.
- Wax where? You want to use Sex Wax anywhere your feet will go. If you have a longboard, you will need a lot more Sex Wax than used on a fish. On shortboards you can skip the nose but on longboards you will want to coat the whole thing.
- Wax on. We will be applying a bit of steady pressure so remove the fins and put the surfboard on something soft. Obviously the wax goes on top where you stand, not on the bottom. Take the basecoat wax and rub it back and forth from one rail to the other. Apply with light pressure to get an even coat. Work your way down a bit and then apply the wax vertically. You should start to see small bumps of wax appear where the two directions converge. Remember, a uniform sheet of wax is not going to help. The little bumps of wax are what keep you on the surfboard. After you get your basecoat down, use whatever grade of surf wax you have chosen to reflect your local water temperatures. Apply this is a cross hatch pattern to raise up even more bumps. This layer will grind down after active surf sessions. You will have to keep applying more wax but the basecoat will make it easier because you will not have to start from scratch.
Tip: Those sad little hunks of discarded wax can be molded into a lump and squished onto your surfboard in an out of the way spot. These emergency bumps are perfect when you’re in the water and discover some slippery spots on your board.