How To Wear Board Shorts
Knowing how to wear board shorts is important not only for flexibility in surfing, but also for comfort. Board shorts are definitely not the swim trunks your mama bought you when you were a kid. Board shorts are worn by young people all over these days, whether they are at the beach or not. You, too, can make a fashion statement by wearing board shorts.
- Board shorts are made to fit perfectly at the waist with extra room down below for radical board maneuvers. Even if you never attempt any radical board maneuvers, you will appreciate the extra space when you climb out of swimming pools or the back seat of a car. Board shorts definitely need to be tried on before purchase. Your waist size will vary from brand to brand. When you do this, remove your frilly panties. Most men are buck naked beneath their board shorts, and you cannot get a good fit by slipping them on over your underpants. The waist should be tight enough to keep the board shorts from sliding off, but you want a little room to prevent hip chafing.
- Good board shorts will be a hybrid of cotton and Lycra. The stretchy material makes life easier if you surf because wet material tends to cling to your legs. Cheap board shorts will be made out of non-flexible materials like cotton or the mutant variants of cotton. These board shorts will not last long if you surf or kick your legs a lot like a bodyboarder or swimmer. They are less comfortable due to chafing and are more prone to ripping. When board shorts rip, there is no dignity. The worst part is you probably won’t realize what happened until you are in the most socially awkward place, like waiting in line at the store with some giggling girls behind you. The seam usually rips in a perfectly straight line, making a sort of kilt. Unless you are very confident, do not bend over at this point.
- Color is not a big deal, with a few exceptions. White, yellow, pale blues and tan board shorts may reveal more of your masculinity than you would expect. Much like a wet T-shirt contest, the material tends to outline your package. Some of the paler materials can make you feel awkward after you get wet. Like "showing off your veins" awkward.
Board shorts need to fit securely around the waist. The baggy look for board shorts could be the end of your social career. The ocean will tear them off you and you will be forced to run for it because your useless friends will be too busy laughing at you to help. Most board shorts have Velcro pockets which are useless for keeping your car keys. There is usually a little loop of string inside, however. Simply loop your key ring through this to keep them safe.