Guys, if you have a one night stand, you must implement one night stand etiquette. What in the blue hell is one night stand etiquette? You meet some cool babe at some nightclub or bar and she says you can boink her, but you need to do a few things after you have sex with her. You are only out for one thing, sex. That’s the only thing that should be on your mind.
- One night stand etiquette rule #1: Do not be clingy: After you do the sexual hokey-pokey, just leave. Women do not like men that are sissies and she already has a box of tampons in her house, she doesn’t need another one. Men that get needy and clingy are emotional tampons. You don’t need all of these emotions for this chick that you will never see again. Words of wisdom: find her, freak her, and flee.
- One night stand etiquette rule #2: Do not call her. She is not your probation officer; you do not have to report your status to her the next day. All you have to do is get your clothes on and get the hell out of her place or if she is at your place, tell her to get to stepping. Get rid of her phone number pronto, Tonto.
- One night stand etiquette rule #3: Do not leave love letters or notes. You do not need to leave this girl a love letter. You are not Don Juan DeMarco; ease up on being a romantic. You are with this girl to do one thing and one thing only. You are not this girl’s father either. You do not need to leave her a note on the nightstand telling her you left or you need to see her again.
- One night stand etiquette rule #4: Do not contact her again. Yeah, this means no emailing, text messaging, and messaging this chick on MySpace or Facebook. Leave the chick alone and move on to the next. There is no need to be attached to a chick that you have a one night encounter with. That is why they call it a one night stand, it is for one night. Your super sperm must not go to waste on one chick.
One night stand etiquette is just as important as the one night stand itself. You find a girl you want to get freaky in the sheets with and you turn her loose. You want her for sex and that is it.