posted
10/21/12
If this is your first Movember, you’re going to notice facial hair like never before. Even experienced growers can make a game out of spotting different varieties of the ’stache throughout the month. Here’s some of the moustachioed magic you may encounter.
Chevron
What It Looks Like: You grow the hair out, shaving so that the ’stache covers most of your upper lip.
What It Says: I am going to bust you for weed.
Handlebar
What It Looks Like: The hair grows long, past the lips, and is curled upward and sometimes around with moustache wax.
What It Says: I appreciate the finer points of paleomasculinity and possibly own a penny farthing.
Face Creeper
What It Looks Like: You start shaving, then you get bored.
What It Says: Though I don’t remember it, I was once in an outlaw biker club.
Fu Manchu
What It Looks Like: Shave in the middle, let the left and right sides grow long.
What It Says: I am a nefarious super-criminal hell-bent on world domination.
Toothbrush
What It Looks Like: Just the middle part of a ’stache, thick.
What It Says: “Hitler,” mostly.
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