The hangover is nature’s way of telling you to start drinking first thing in the morning. Barring the proverbial hair of the dog that bit you, you’re going to need something to keep you from feeling like someone is hammering a nail into your forehead all day. Of course, the easiest hangover cure is skipping that eighth shot of Patron. But that’s boring, not to mention way too late. So here are some actual, legit, scientifically sound ways to defend yourself against alcohol’s revenge.
1. Food, Dude
Tastiest shoe ever? Until Nike comes out with the Air McRib, yes!
Before you even down your first Cuba Libre you can start warding off the next morning’s pain. Because drinking takes vitamins B and C out of your body, foods with those nutrients—such as whole grains, potatoes, bananas and chili peppers for B and kiwi, broccoli, strawberries and oranges for C—are a great preventive measure. Also, milk helps you absorb booze more slowly, and juice-based cocktails like screwdrivers ensure your body replenishes nutrients while you drink. Don’t worry—anyone who mocks you for ordering them will pay for it the following day.
There is a strange new drink on the market you can add to your coffee, booze and energy drink regimen. It’s called “water” and there’s so much of it, it’s basically free. As the main cause of hangovers is dehydration, have a glass between drinks to keep yourself hydrated through the night, and before you pass out in a heap, down as much agua as you can stomach. And as much as you desperately want coffee in the morning, try to steer clear—it’s a diuretic, fancy science talk for “something that makes you pee a lot and dehydrates you more.”
3. Nux Vomica
No, it’s not the latest death metal band out of Sweden. It’s a tree nut containing tons of strychnine. Sounds pretty healthy, right? Homeopathic doctor Lauri Grossman recommends nux vomica as a hangover cure that works in minutes. The good doc recommends that you take a 30C potency four times throughout the day. It will also relieve your headache and sensitivity to light. You can get this at any natural food store or even big chains like Whole Foods. No functioning alcoholic should be without it.