drug-test

So it’s pretty much a given that all Made Man readers are upstanding, law-abiding citizens. But let’s just say you had one too many poppy seed muffins in celebration of your new job, and now they’re coming at you with a drug test. Relax, we’ve got you covered. Yaacov Shoham, founder of the IDenta Touch&Know home drug test, knows all about the process and was kind enough to share the following pro tips. Give ’em a shot, be discreet, and with any luck you won’t become another Onterrio Smith.

-

Be wary of rubber bands, Velcro and tape because the test administrator may stand outside the door and listen for those things.

-

1. Dilution
This is probably the most common way to beat a drug test. Before you take your test, drink eight glasses of water or more, until your urine is clear. However, be sure not to chug gallons of water, as you can run the risk of water poisoning.  Also, since some test administrators will check the color to ensure dilution was not tried, take B-vitamins to add color back into your urine.

2. Detox Drinks
It is unclear how these actually work, but they do. Be cautious when taking because they usually start working in about one to two hours, they don’t last for long periods of time, and they may not work for some people. Also, they can be on the pricy side, so ask around or test before you actually use them.

3. Substitution/Synthetics
This is probably the most difficult way to cheat your way through a urine test because you have to smuggle it in. You can either bring a container filled with a clean friend’s urine or a pre-mixed sample, or employ a prosthetic penis. If you decide to go with this option, remember that some tests measure the temperature of the urine. Keep the sample close to your body so the liquid will be close enough to body temperature. Finally, be wary of rubber bands, Velcro and tape because the test administrator may stand outside the door and listen for those things.

4. Midol
This one may seem a little surprising, but Midol contains diuretics, which promote the production of urine, diluting the amount of drugs in your system.

5. Timing
You always want to give your cleanest sample, so try to urinate at least two times before taking your test, because the first time you use the bathroom each day is the dirtiest. Also, collect your sample mid-stream.