Sex boosts endorphins, relieves stress, induces better sleep, kicks headaches and so on. Science even says that the more often you and your partner have it, the happier your relationship is.

That’s because intimacy builds chemically charged connections and sexual compatibility makes and saves a lot of relationships. Likewise, a lack of sexual compatibility can break relationships. And, for women whose turn-ons run the gamut, good sex—like orgasmic, physically and mentally exhausting, sweaty, stupefying sex—doesn’t always come easy.

Still, you don’t necessarily need to be pulling off acrobatics in the bedroom. Sometimes, it really is the little things that count. Such as the following…

“A mix of pleasure and pain. Spank me. Choke me. Pull my hair. But also kiss my whole body and tell me I’m beautiful, thanks.”

1. Izzy, 37: “I don’t love dirty talk but communication makes sex that much better. I like when a man can verbalize what he wants and makes it obvious when he’s into something I’m doing. I also like when he asks me what I like so I feel more comfortable guiding him. We’re all different, so we just need to be open about our desires.”

2. Claire, 27: “Falling asleep afterward. Sex makes me so sleepy—especially if I come—and spooning together after is great.”

3. Alex, 26: “Eye contact.”

4. Olivia, 25: “Making out during sex makes it more passionate.”

5. Kelly, 29: “It sounds cliché, but I love when a man says my name during sex. It makes it more personal, like he’s into me and not just any vagina.”

6. Sydney, 25: “Sweaty sex is the best sex. It’s like carnal proof that shit got real.”

7. Jillian, 31: “I really like when a man talks to me during sex. The more dirty talk, the hotter it is.”

8. Kelsey, 23: “I don’t know why, but kissing during sex takes it to another level—from just fucking to actual intimacy.”

9. Michelle, 27: “A mix of pleasure and pain. Spank me. Choke me. Pull my hair. But also kiss my whole body and tell me I’m beautiful, thanks.”

10. Victoria, 28: “I like when men actually make sounds during sex. It makes me feel awkward when I’m the only one moaning. Even just heavy breathing is better than silence.”

11. Jenny, 25: “I’d say eye contact during sex makes it super intimate.”

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