Douchebags. They are a real problem in Las Vegas. Casinos love douchebags and treat them like the rock stars they aren’t in order to drain their pockets. The bright city lights effectively become a bug zapper for their breed, wobbling around all top heavy from chest-and-arms-only workouts, aglow with a hospital-light orange hue and proud of chauvinistic ignorance. You’re going to want to avoid the douche-traps in order to enjoy your time in Las Vegas, so check out the six least douchey bars in Las Vegas.
Stoney’s Rockin‘ Country
This place is just far enough away from the Strip to leave all the douchebags behind, but close enough for a cheap cab ride. Sitting just two miles south of Mandalay Bay on Las Vegas Boulevard sits Stoney’s, a rock and country club. The place features all you can drink for $20, bikini bull riding, line dancing, live rock and country shows and some very hot cowgirls working the bar.
Ellis Island Casino and Brewery
Just a block east of the Strip behind Bally’s sits a brewery. It’s not the classiest place and does not boast the most attractive women, but it has great beer and is wildly inexpensive: you can get an Irish Car Bomb for less than five dollars. Start your night here then move to rowdier and more expensive environs. Who knows? You might end up staying for the hilarious karaoke.
Hard Rock Hotel’s Center Bar
The Hard Rock attracts a different breed a people, and none of them fall into the stereotypical douchebag category. The classy center bar in the Hard Rock Hotel is a place for good music and quality drinks. Avoid the place during summertime on Sundays when “Rehab”, the pool party, takes place. The sweaty meat market, taking place just outside of the center bar, attracts some of the biggest douchebags from across the world.
Todd English Pub
Tucked away inside the Aria is Todd English’s P.U.B., right across from Eve nightclub. The restaurant has a center bar that serves a wide variety of quality suds. You may notice the hour glasses placed all along the bar. Order a beer, tell the barkeep you want to race the clock, and if you can drink your brew before the sand runs out (seven seconds), it’s free.
The Foundation Room is a classy night club that sits at the very top of the Mandalay Bay. It’s not the usual open-spaced meat-market in which you’ll find douchebags lurking. It looks like the inside of a European castle, has finely dressed patrons and possesses the best view of the Las Vegas Strip.
Nine Fine Irishmen
Inside the belly of the New York New York is an authentic Irish pub. It attracts an older crowd, but any place that serves blood sausage isn’t going to attract “Jersey Shore” fans anytime soon.