It’s been said by numerous sources, from scientists to pick up artists, that a woman decides if she’s going to sleep with a man within the first several seconds of laying eyes on him. That doesn’t guarantee getting lucky — you can still blow it once you open your mouth. But if you don’t exude the sexual charisma that it takes to raise her eyebrows, you might as well buy an extra tube of hand cream on your way home from the bar.
Look the part
So you’re eyeing up a hottie at your local watering hole (or airport). No matter how great a catch you may be, if you’re dressed like a sweaty tourist, the only thing she’s gonna give you are directions out of the bar. So baggy jeans and a jersey are out… what’s a look that exudes that telegraphs to your target that you’re an experienced carpenter (ie you’re great at NAILING… heh heh)?
Well, it depends on the girl. But on average, you can’t go wrong with a clean, "cool" look. No matter how lame that metrosexual trend might’ve been, there’s a reason it was so huge — it got dudes laid. Robert Green, the somewhat douchey but fairly brilliant author of "The Art of Seduction," doesn’t call this look/archtype metrosexual. He calls it being a "rake." And, historically, rakes have passed into the next world with the most notches on their bedposts. So being rakish is a good thing.
So how do you dress like a rake? Well, your look needs to convey your three crucial attributes — your confidence, your coolness and your sexual prowess. No, that doesn’t mean it’s time to dig out your Female Body Inspector hat from your mom’s attic.
We’d suggest something confident and trendy (like a pair of skinny jeans) paired with something loud and borderline outrageous (like a wild colored button down and a pair of red shoes) with a touch of "asexual, sexual" flair (like some bracelets, a necklace or anything else that looks like it might’ve been pilfered from a woman after a night of steamy love making).
Whatever look you go with, you have to make sure you’re confident rocking it. You could wear the coolest shirt on the market but if you feel like a pussy in it, you’re not going to be getting any. Pussy, that is. CONFIDENCE is CRUCIAL.
Smell like sex
What did you smell like after the last time you had sex? Sweaty, a bit nasty and a lot like her perfume. Thankfully, there’s a cologne on the market that can replicate that smell, called Morning After.
Wait, no, there isn’t. But there damn well should be. Because while women don’t like a stinky man they also don’t like the smell of a bar of soap either, which is what a lot of mass market colognes smell like.
So if you can’t completely replicate that Morning After smell, you might as well come as close as humanly possible… when you’re getting ready to hit your pick-up spots, definitely take a shower but DON’T SHAMPOO YOUR HAIR. Just rinse it with water and add a smidgen of conditioner.
Get some unscented anti-perspirant because while you don’t want to smell like an air freshener but she’s not gonna give you the digits if your pits are dripping.
Then make sure the shirt you’re rocking has been worn once or twice before. And then visit a female friend (or a Sephora) and get a spritz of her favorite perfume a couple times on your clothes.
If you do it right, this potent mixture of manly and feminine smells will be too hard for her to fight. And it’s damn cheaper than cologne.
Walk the walk
We can’t stress this enough… CONFIDENCE, CONFIDENCE, CONFIDENCE! You know that when you open your mouth, you need confidence to bag the kitty. Your walk and posture and general physical demeanor before you talk to any potential one night stands is just as important, if not moreso.
Here’s a seemingly stupid tip that actually works — walk pelvis first. Don’t look like a fool and make sure you’re not sporting wood, but yes, really, walk pelvis first. When paired with confidence, a pelvis-first walk conveys the message that "This Guy Has A Lot of Sex."
Also, your posture is key. You need a relaxed-but-upright posture with absolutely relaxed shoulders. Everything about your physical presence has to transmit to her that you are absolutely unfazed by her presence. Why? Because most primitive guy reactions to women are a mixture of terror and stupidity. A completely relaxed and unfazed physical presence will send her for a loop… "What’s up with THIS guy?" she’ll think. "And where do I get in line?" Okay, she probably won’t be thinking that last part. But she’ll be intrigued… that’s for damn sure.
After your presence has piqued her interest, you gotta reel her in. First step is to make effective eye contact. Smile at her and look at her directly in the eyes. The trick now is a balancing act — you don’t want to be the first one to break eye contact but you can’t be a creepo who stares.
So make your eye contact, keep it and then do something to get her to break first. If you can make funny (but not ugly) faces, make a funny (but not ugly) face and then smile. More likely than not, she’ll blink and smile.
You could also wipe a corner of your mouth, indicating that she has a food smudge on her face, even if she doesn’t. If you can pull this one off with a straight face, this technique is a winner because you’re lowering her defenses on multiple levels — she’ll think you were looking at her because of the food smudge rather than because she’s a hot chick and that will briefly make her think you’re not interested in her. And as many pick up artists will tell you, the key to picking up women is to make them think you have zero interest in picking them up.
Okay, so you’ve got her hooked. Don’t just saunter up to her (pelvis first) and drop your best game. Turn away, briefly, pay for your drink, talk to a buddy of yours and count to three, and then turn back and if she’s no longer looking your way, head over.
You want to catch her with her guard down and that requires that she stop sizing you up when you strike up a conversation. Like with all the other nonverbal techniques listed in this article, if you approach correctly, she won’t think, "God this guy is another cheesy dude trying to pick me up in a bar." She’s going to think, "Man, I was just pulled into this stud’s sexual orbit. I might suck on his penis this evening." And if you don’t blow it with the VERBAL stuff, that’s exactly how your fine evening will conclude. Let’s just hope she’s not a lunatic.