10. Paris Hilton was heard telling friends that “faking your death” is the new “get out of the car with no panties”

9. She had a book entitled “Michael Jackson’s Greatest Places to Hide” by her side when they found her.

8. Fox just announced a live interview scheduled for next week entitled “If I Died”

7. Trimspa just received an anonymous order for 4,000 bottles

6. A recent CIA photo showed Osama Bin Laden in a cave with a busty blonde

5. When they wheeled her in they thought the nurse said “We have a dead body” but it was really Anna Nicole saying “Do you like my body”

4. Howard K. Stern announced He was her doctor and she was doing just fine

3. The track marks on her arms from heroin spelled out “You’ve Been Punked”

2. Heaven called and said they were having trouble installing the stripper pole

1. Anna put on 10 pounds during the ambulance ride over to the hosital