posted
03/12/11
After much deliberation, we’ve picked the three best "Always Sunny" quotes, as submitted by our readers. In no particular order, the winners are:
Shanna McNear
Charlie: Oh, I’m sorry. Well, I can put the trash into a landfill where it’s gonna stay for millions of years, or I can burn it up and get a nice smoky smell in here and let that smoke goes to the sky where it turns into stars.
Mac: That doesn’t sound right, but I don’t know enough about stars to dispute it.
Alex Rehbein
Dennis: I’m a recovering crackhead, this is my retarded sister that I take care of. I’d like some welfare please.
Michael Rice
Charlie: Do wasps make honey?
Dennis: No, wasps do not make honey.
Charlie: All right, well, I’m gonna check it out anyway; there could be something delicious in here that wasps do make, and I want that.
Thanks to everyone who participated. More giveaways to come, so stay tuned.
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St. Patrick’s Day is almost here, and if you’re like us, you’re already stocked up on Smithwicks, Bushmill and a healthy serving of good old-fashioned Irish spirit (the drinking kind). What you might not have is a free Paddy’s Pub T-shirt, as seen on It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia, courtesy of Made Man and 80sTees.com. Lucky for you, we’re giving away three of them. Here’s how to get one:
Leave a comment below or on the link to this post on our Facebook page with your favorite quote from It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia. The best quotes win. If you don’t watch the show, this might be a good time to start. We’ll announce the winners later this week, and you’ll get your free shirt shortly after that, just in time for you to rock it on St. Patty’s day. The deadline to submit a quote is Friday March 11 at 3 pm ET. If you leave an anonmyous quote on this page, we won’t know who you are, so be sure to register and leave your e-mail address. Good luck!
COMMENTS
March 18, 2011 2:18 pm
J c
Rickety Cricket: It’s all in the Nips and Hips! I’m Sexy!!!
March 10, 2011 1:57 pm
scotto.101
Charlie: I’m gonna rise up, I’m gonna to kick a little ass, I’m gonna to kick some ass in the U.S.A., gonna climb a mountain, gonna sew a flag, gonna fly on an eagle. I’m gonna kick some butt, I’m gonna drive a big truck, I’m gonna rule this world, I’m gonna kick some ass, I’m gonna rise up, I’m gonna kick a little ass. ROCK, FLAG, and EAGLE!!
OR
Dennis: I hate listening to people’s dreams. It is like flipping through a stack of photographs. If I’m not in any of them and nobody is having sex, I just don’t care.
March 10, 2011 9:01 pm
Willaaaay
Dennis: You know what I’m concerned about? I don’t want to get too bulky. I want to stay nice and lean and tight. I want to get that Jesus on the cross look.
Sweet Dee: I see what you’re saying. I think that crucifixion must have been really good for your core.
Dennis: Oh absolutely. Jesus had like the best abs. He had the right idea. He knew no pain no gain.
March 10, 2011 4:34 am
mrmoneybags7777
“Let me tell you a little lesson, buddy. The cream always rises to the top. And I’m about to show you the white, hot cream of an eighth-grade boy.â€
March 10, 2011 9:16 am
undrcroft
Charlie: Ohhhhhhhh shit! Look at that door,the one marked “pirate”? You think a pirate lives in there?
Dennis: I see a door marked “Private.” Is that the door you’re talking about?
Charlie: Nah, I was talking abou….what did you hear?
Dennis: I heard you say “There was a door marked pirate.”
Charlie: Are we gonna talk about pirates all day or are we gonna see what’s living in there?
Dennis: You’re the one that….Jesus Christ man, shit.
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March 11, 2011 12:19 am
Chemical Toilet
Frank: Masturbating bums are bad for business
March 12, 2011 12:35 am
brewmaster mike
“Viet-goddamn-nam’s what happened! Go get me a beer bitch!”
March 12, 2011 3:29 am
ab8
Charlie: I’m in love with a man…a man named God. Does that make me gay? Am I gay for God? YOU BETCHA!!!
March 11, 2011 7:51 am
BennyV
“Its not that I’m ashamed of you, its that I’m ashamed of myself”
or
“Your breath smells like an old lady fart passing through an onion.”
or
“If I was looking for safe I wouldn’t be sticking my dick through a wall.”
March 10, 2011 1:50 am
dsmithgator
What are you gonna do, hit him? No, that’s a terrible idea. I’ll tell you why, It doesn’t unbang your mom.
March 10, 2011 2:47 am
ab8
I think someone just got a nickname…PUSSY HANDS!!!!!
March 10, 2011 12:45 am
Cody V
“The streets of Philadelphia are flowing from the ejaculate of the homeless”
March 10, 2011 12:55 am
Stephen Hounam
“whats the one major thing missing from all action movies these days guys? ….full penetration. We’re gonna show dolph lundgren REALLY going to town on this hot young lab tech! then he smells crime again and hes out bustin heads, then hes back to the lab for some more full penetration. smells crime, back to the lab full penetration, crime, penetration, and this goes on and on, back and forth for 90 minutes until the movie just sort of ends….”
March 10, 2011 12:15 am
JackR
I am loving this can-wine thing, I think it’s brilliant. I mean I’m active, I’m gesturing with my hands, and I don’t feel restricted. If I was holding a wine glass right now I’d be spilling wine all over the god damn place.
March 11, 2011 12:25 pm
tchmill42
“I used to have some jean shorts like that too, I slept in them shits man. Eventually I blew the crotch out of them things. You can’t wear them everyday and expect for them to hold up. That’s some nice ass denim too. I miss those shorts.”
March 11, 2011 1:03 pm
syc514
“Cat in the wall, eh? Now you’re talking my language!”
March 9, 2011 4:32 pm
unhero
Did you fucking fuck my mom, Santa?!
I made a comic so you can truly see what I’m talking about.
http://i.imgur.com/fQjRR.jpg
March 9, 2011 12:31 pm
BHaze726
I’m a recovering crackhead, this is my retarded sister that I take care of. I’d like some welfare please.
March 9, 2011 2:16 pm
Trez88
Well, maybe you shouldn’t dress like a bumblebee, bitch.
March 9, 2011 7:07 pm
mikeg
Charlie: oh my god i just found a rats nest slaughtered about 200 of them. It’s like whole generations of those things have died at my hands. Mothers, fathers, grandfathers, little baby rats.
March 9, 2011 10:46 pm
kimbih
Parenting is pretending you know what you’re talking about, then jamming it down their throat
March 9, 2011 8:58 am
Will S
I knew i shouldnt have left philly, i mean trees? everywhere, Trees?!
March 9, 2011 10:34 am
Heated
Later dudes, S in your A’s, don’t wear any C’s, and J all over your B’s.
March 9, 2011 11:17 am
nick.russell
Frank: Coercing a confession is like a beautiful dance……A beautiful dance with a chainsaw!
March 9, 2011 11:23 am
jbuscher86
YEHAAAAAA WILDCARD BITCHES
March 9, 2011 4:29 am
KWoff
Think there’s no answer? You’re so stupid! There is! Kitten Mittens.
March 9, 2011 3:21 am
Joe Donatelli
What’s your bean situation?
March 9, 2011 3:35 am
KevinDean
DAYMAN – YAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
March 9, 2011 8:21 am
horncob
Charlie: Mac, can an asshole rip in half?
Mac: Like tissue paper.
March 9, 2011 6:03 am
KWoff
Class is the ability to mingle with people beneath you.
March 9, 2011 7:47 am
shanmc
Oh, I’m sorry. Well, I can put the trash into a landfill where’s gonna stay for millions of years, or I can burn it up and get a nice smoky smell in here and let that smoke goes to the sky where it turns into stars.