Everyone wants to live the American Dream. We want to get a good job, find a super-hot woman who we fall madly in love with, settle down and start a family, and then find out that our babe-of-a-wife is set to inherit a fortune, and that we can quit our crappy “good job” and spend the rest of our lives on a private beach sipping hard liquor out of a coconut shell with a tiny, gold-plated umbrella sticking out of it. Unfortunately, we can’t all accomplish this dream-life; there simply aren’t that many private beaches in the world, but here are a few Hot Heiresses that can easily afford to make your dream-life a reality:
Amanda is the great-granddaughter of media tycoon William Randolph Hearst, who’s media empire reports about $5 Billion in revenue every year. She’s also the niece of famous kidnapping victim Patty Hearst. She studied Art History at Boston College and Fordham University, and moonlights as a model. Also, she’s incredibly, incredibly hot, in case you didn’t notice.
Many rich men are not attractive (see Donald Trump), but they still score hot women because they are rich. If they’re lucky, their children will inherit more of hot mom’s traits than rich, ugly dad’s, and the result will be a child who’s not ugly. It’s an understatement to describe Ivanka Trump simply as “not ugly”, because Ivanka is about as far from ugly as her father is from a food bank. She’s so hot that it’s unreal. Rumor has it that Ivanka constantly moves in slow motion with her hair blowing in the wind, like the super-hot girls in the movies. That was based on her. She’s so hot that time actually slows down so that it can check her out longer. That’s hot.
It’s simply impossible to have a Hot Heiresses list without the inclusion of Paris. Like it or not, she’s an uber-babe. Not only that, she’s an uber-babe who has a sex tape. Sure, she didn’t intend on it being released, and got pretty upset when it was, but she quickly figured out how to profit from the situation both publicly and financially, and it provided a huge bump to her popularity. That’s a sense of resourcefulness that we haven’t seen from people who are actually trying to prove themselves, let alone from someone who’s already set for life. The fact is, Paris doesn’t have to do anything. She doesn’t need the money that she gets from modeling or “acting”. She does it for us. The least we can do is look at her and drool a little bit…out of respect, of course
Does it get any better than two Hot Heiress sisters? Nicky is Paris’s younger sister, and considering she was born holding a really shiny silver spoon, she’s no less ambitious than her older sister, and seems determined to make a name for herself outside of her family’s hotel chain legacy. At age 17, Nicky started designing handbags, and by age 21 she had launched her own clothing line and gotten into modeling, thus laying the groundwork for her own future empire and the eventual spawning of hot heiresses for the next generation.
The daughter of world-renowned clothing designer Ralph Lauren, Dylan is currently the owner of a candy shop in New York City, called Dylan’s Candy Bar. She graduated from Duke with an Art History degree and a minor in hotness, which came naturally to her. US Weekly named Dylan one of their 25 Most Stylish New Yorkers, and Crain’s New York Business featured her in a 40 under 40 list. All in all, Dylan is a woman to watch, which is just fine with us.
Yeah, that’s right: Julia Louis-Dreyfus. Besides tearing it up on the big screen (Christmas Vacation, Soul Man, A Bug’s Life) and the small screen (Seinfeld, SNL, The New Adventures of Old Christine), Julia is a bonified heiress. Her family owns the French Louis-Dreyfus Group, one of the largest commodities trading firms in the world. We have no idea what a commodities trading firm does, but apparently it makes people rich. Additionally, her father is a billionaire attorney and business executive. Unfortunately, you’ll have a tough time riding Julia’s coat tails to fortune, because she’s already happily married to her high school sweetheart. We can still dream, though. We can always dream.